We seem to be rewarding high emotional intelligence.
So what exactly is high emotional intelligence?
Many people can't explain it clearly.
When we don't understand the specific definition of a concept
We are not qualified or even worthy to use this concept.
It’s like you say you want to eat KFC, but you don’t even know what KFC is, so the KFC you’re talking about may not be the real KFC.
Let me tell you my understanding
First, the literal meaning:
High self-emotional management skills
So here comes the question
When do we need to manage our emotions?
When I'm alone, isn't it good for me to just follow my heart?
So generally when you are getting along with others or making some decisions related to others
Emotional intelligence is required.
From the perspective of interpersonal relationships,
The manifestation of high emotional intelligence is not about who is right or wrong.
This is not a rational perspective.
It's an emotional perspective.
A sign of high emotional intelligence is that others will feel more comfortable being with you.
This is comfortable and has many levels
First of all, the needs and feelings of the other party should be taken into consideration.
If there are multiple parties together, we have to consider everyone's feelings.
How to consider it?
I think respect comes first.
Respect their feelings, respect their opinions, respect their habits
for example,
Including you have 4 people,
First, lower your position.
Then you have to figure out who is the most important.
The second thing is that you have to rank each person in your mind.
When you are talking to the most important people, you should not ignore the feelings of less important people.
This ability is high emotional intelligence
There is a book called "High Emotional Intelligence is the Ability to Speak"
But I think this is not enough.
A lot of information is not conveyed through language.
I think: high emotional intelligence means that I care about you.
And you can handle complex relationships and make everyone feel cared for.
Let me give you another example.
I was discussing something with my friend and his assistant was also there.
While I was chatting with him, I also poured a cup of tea for his assistant.
What I mean is that even though I didn’t talk to you, I still care about you.
There are many interpretations of emotional intelligence.
There are many things you can find online so I won’t go into details.
I think the most important thing is not to control your emotions.
Instead, it can stimulate other people's emotions and make them feel that you care about them.
And without being glib.