Just three hundred ten quadrillion, nine hundred three trillion, twenty-seven billion, one hundred thirty-one million, six hundred thirty-seven thousand, two hundred USDT.

Me: Hey Binance, could you transfer 0.8 USDT worth of $ETH from my web3 wallet to my spot account?

Binance: Sure! That’ll cost you a teeny-tiny 0.03 USDT in fees. Easy peasy.

Me: Great, thanks.

[10 minutes later...]

Me: Hey Binance, why is this still pending? I’m getting impatient. Can you speed it up?

Binance: Of course! We have the perfect "Speed Up" option for you.

Me: Oh, cool! How much?

Binance: Just a small fee of...( drumroll please )...

$310,903,027,131,637,200.00 USDT or in other words just three hundred ten quadrillion, nine hundred three trillion, twenty-seven billion, one hundred thirty-one million, six hundred thirty-seven thousand, two hundred USDT only.

Me: What kind of "speed" are we talking here?! Warp drive? Time travel? Delivering my transaction personally via Elon Musk's Mars rocket and that too in 1683 A.D by time travel I mean wtf Binance bro??

Binance: Look, you wanted speed, and speed comes at a premium. We don’t make the rules. Oh wait, we do.

Me: Forget it. I wanted to speed it up not buy the whole freaking blockchajn you know. I’ll wait the 8 hours. Take your sweet time. Maybe give me your dealers number in the meanwhile as i also wanna smoke whatever you're smoking now a days mr. No 1 crypto exchange in the world.

Lesson learned: Never rush Binance unless you’re Jeff Bezos.

#true_story #Binance #fml

P.S, I am not even kidding. Look at the attached screenshot.