The cryptocurrency industry is very, very weird.
What would you expect from an industry founded by cypherpunks and embraced in its early days by privacy and cryptology idealists, software geeks, anarcho-capitalists and disenchanted Ron Paul voters?
As crypto grew and creating new cryptocurrencies became ever easier during the initial coin offering (ICO) era, no idea was too stupid or left-field to ignore. And that’s before creating a memecoin could be done at the touch of a button, resulting in millions of coins that don’t even have an idea.
It would be impossible to make an exhaustive list of all the weird crypto projects out there, but here are a few favorites:
1. Crypto cavity, Dentacoin
Founded in 2017, the Dentacoin Foundation and its eponymous cryptocurrency aimed to streamline the modern dental industry. The Ethereum-based Dentacoin (DCN) token was supposed to become a “utility token, used for rewards, payments, and exchange within and beyond the dental industry,” according to the Netherlands-based project’s white paper.For practitioners, the token was said to be a means of payment for materials, equipment, and other services, while patients could earn it by taking oral health surveys, providing practitioner reviews and tracking and maintaining oral health practices.
The ultimate goal was to speed up medical payments, which can often take a lot of time and involve a lot of red tape.
Like many tokens with niche use cases, the DCN price spiked on release and then flatlined. As of Aug. 24, the project’s market capitalization was just $235,000, failing to meet its lofty ambitions of disrupting the dental industry with blockchain.
You may want some novocaine for that.
2. Lovecraftian cult worships Cthulu with crypto
Cthulu emerges from the sea. Source: Andree Wallin
Forum users represented FHTAGN (the ticker itself is a word from the unpronounceable and horrific language of the Old Ones) as part of the religion and mythology surrounding Cthulu, i.e., tokens were “offerings,” holders were “cultists,” and coins were mined through “sacrifice.”
According to the few sites that track it, Cthulu has no measurable market capitalization and a valuation of $0.000032 per token.
Other Cthulu-related tokens have appeared. The much cuter Cute Cthulu (CTHULU) coin is a Solana-based project that aims to raise awareness and support efforts on sea life and ecology.
In June, the project donated $2,000 to The Ocean Cleanup.
“In His House at R’lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming.”
3. SpankChain, Google this one yourself…
If crypto was to be the native money of the internet, then it was only a matter of time before it crossed paths with pornography and adult entertainment. Founded amid the ICO boom, SpankChain enjoyed fairly positive media coverage. It aimed to provide a platform for adult performers to have more control and agency over how they are compensated for their work. The currency was used for payments on Spank.live. Performer Allie Awesome told Cointelegraph Magazine in 2020 that she made a small fortune via the site’s CryptoTitties app. “I like that I get to keep 100% of the payments when I use CryptoTitties, rather than losing 20% or more with fiat payment processors,” she said, adding, “It’s really hard to get non-crypto people to use it.”Despite promotion from famous pornographic performers and millions of dollars in investment, the project ran into some roadblocks in March 2023 and has been largely dormant since. SpankChain had to close its payment processor, SpankPay, after the latter lost its service provider, Wyre, and failed to find a new one. However, according to the SpankPay X page, the project will soon return and is already letting users register usernames. 4. Trump coins are not winning biglyWhile not always a fan of cryptocurrency, former United States President and 2024 presidential candidate Donald Trump has been present in the space — in one way or another — for some time now.To date, several cryptocurrencies are explicitly dedicated to Trump and supposedly support his bid to return to the White House. The first, which was initially launched as Trump Coin but has since rebranded to FreedomCoin (FREE), launched in 2016, eight years before he came out in support of the cryptocurrency industry.
Donald Trump dances at a major campaign rally in the Bronx, New York pic.twitter.com/heFOYzRVIX
— S p r i n t e r (@SprinterFamily) May 24, 2024The most “successful” — the Solana-based TrumpCoin (DJT) — has a market capitalization of $1.43 million. The project has no official affiliation with the Trump campaign, and infamous “Pharma Bro” Martin Shkreli alluded to helping create the token. Research firm Arkham Intelligence has even offered a $150,000 bounty to anyone who can definitively prove who started the project. Rapid price action and speculation on the token suggest it’s likely just a memecoin, capitalizing on the hype around Trump and the US elections. None of the various Trump coins are officially affiliated with Trump’s campaign or organization. However, his presidential campaign does accept crypto donations. Make crypto weird again. 5. Pot coins drank the bong waterThe marijuana industry was no stranger to the ubiquitous bespoke token projects at the ICO boom’s peak. Initially, the weed tokens did actually solve a problem for the US cannabis industry. A weed ban on a federal level meant that any bank with Federal Depositors Insurance (pretty much any bank you’d want to do business with) would not offer services to weed farmers, distributors or dispensaries. Crypto would offer a secure way for all these parties to transact without needing to use a bank or carry around enormous bags of cash. PotCoin (POT), HempCoin (THC) and Cannabis Coin (CANN) all emerged as tokens to cure the industry’s ills. PotCoin even sponsored American basketball star Dennis Rodman, who donned a PotCoin shirt on his notorious trip to Singapore to meet with Trump and North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un, which sent the price soaring.
Just arrived to Singapore for the Historical Summit! Looking forward to @POTUS having incredible success that the whole world will benefit by. Thank you @potcoin for supporting my mission! #Peace #Love #HistoricalSummit #Singapore #PresidentTrump #MarshallKimJongUn pic.twitter.com/XNDsyBjLv8
A Garlicoin garlic bulb. Source: Garlicoin
Example of the original Doge meme format. Much outdated. Very 2013. Source: All Things Linguistics
Originally a critique of the highly speculative nature of cryptocurrency, it has become that very thing that its creators wished to criticize.
As of Aug. 20, it has a market capitalization of over $15 billion and an army of fans, including eccentric tech billionaire Elon Musk.
Dogecoin inspired another dog-related coin, Shiba Inu (SHIBA), which was founded in 2020. The pseudonymous “Ryoshi” created the coin as a nod to DOGE, and the idea of a memecoin took flight.
Since then, thousands of strangely named and wildly speculative memecoins have appeared.
Thanks for that, Dogecoin. Stay weird, crypto.