“Good morning, sir! Have you heard about the Bitcoin ETF? Great! Now, I’ve got an even bigger opportunity for you. Give me just one minute to explain how your pension money is going to multiply. By the time you hit 78, your only regret will be not buying more. Sounds good? Let’s dive in. It’s called Ethereum,ticker $ETH and it’s about to get a SPOT ETF. Best smart contract platform in the world with low fees and fast transactions. I can get you in at $3,100 before the approval. What’s that? You’re all in? Fantastic, sir!" Happening at a bank close to you right now.