There is an old saying in Guangdong: "You can dry your clothes in the sun, but you can't dry your life in the sun."
What I mean is, in life, there’s nothing wrong with hanging clothes out to dry.
But if you are too high-profile and show off yourself casually, you will easily be targeted.
The reason why people are high-profile and ostentatious is because they are vain, like face, and hope to make their presence felt in front of others.
The reality is that people who like to show off their presence and are overly high-profile and ostentatious are not only disrespected, but also hated, becoming thorns in the eyes and flesh of others.
As the Dream of Red Mansions says: "If you are too outstanding, people will be jealous; if you are too pure, people will dislike you." If you are too outstanding, you will be easily envied, jealous and hated. If you are too noble, people will dislike you and throw dirty water on you.
A piece of advice: when you are out and about and hanging out with these types of people, try not to be high-profile or show off.
The first category: people who can’t stand others doing well.
The biggest flaw in human nature is that we cannot stand seeing others do well.
You're doing well but you don't say it, that's fine.
But if you are living a good life and you speak it out and let others know, I believe there will be people who don't want you to live a good life.
You must not understand: what does your good life have to do with others?
Why do they have to see people being good?
Because of your kindness, you make others feel uncomfortable.
Others make 60,000 yuan a year, but you brag that you make 300,000 yuan a year.
If your salary is five times higher than others', others will feel that they are not as good as you and cannot accept this reality. Wouldn't that lead to hatred and resentment?
In the eyes of others, we are all human beings, so why is there such a big gap? It's unfair.
It is possible that if you make money by unscrupulous means and are unkind when rich, you will get into trouble sooner or later.
There is a point of view: others hope that you live well, but they don't want you to live better than them. The more you shine, the more dim others will appear.
When dealing with people who can't stand others doing well, the first thing you should do is to be low-key, pretend to be poor, don't show off, and try to offend as few people as possible.
The second category: people with higher status than yourself.
For example, in a village, the captain's salary is about 100,000 yuan, and the village head's salary is also about 100,000 yuan. But you know how to do business and earn hundreds of thousands of yuan a year.
If you get along with the captain and the village chief and often show off how much money you make, what will happen to you?
There is only one result: it will be difficult for you to do business in the future.
You might say, how can this be so exaggerated?
If you think like this, it means that you still don't have enough social experience. If others have a higher status than you and your normal income is higher than others, won't others hate you?
Emperor Gaozu of Han, Liu Bang, asked Han Xin how many soldiers he could lead.
Han Xin replied, "Your Majesty can lead 100,000 soldiers." Emperor Gaozu of Han continued to ask, "How many soldiers can you lead?"
Han Xin replied that the more the better, there was no limit to the number.
After hearing Han Xin's words, Liu Bang became angry and regarded Han Xin as a serious threat. After the Chu-Han War ended, he immediately asked Empress Lü to kill Han Xin and exterminate his three clans to eliminate future troubles.
When dealing with people who are higher in status than you, it is better to be more restrained. Once you show off your edge, you may invite "catastrophe".
The third category: people who are related to you.
The closer people are to each other, the easier it is for them to compare with each other.
For example, relatives will compare you with others no matter what they do. This is human nature of "comparing with those closest to you".
Some time ago, a reader told me a story in the background. During the Chinese New Year, Mr. Chen took his children back to his hometown to visit relatives and friends. As soon as the relatives saw them, they asked, "Which university did your child get into?"
After hearing the relative's question, Mr. Chen said proudly: "My child is doing very well. He performed exceptionally well last year and was admitted to a 985 university in Beijing."
After hearing Mr. Chen's answer, the relative's face immediately changed and his tone of voice became cold. Later, Mr. Chen found out that the relative's son had just been admitted to a junior college.
At this moment, Mr. Chen understood a truth: if someone else's son did poorly on the test, and you boasted that your own son did well, how could others feel psychologically balanced?
It is precisely because of psychological imbalance that there is a change in attitude.
The closer the person is to you, the more likely you are to experience psychological imbalance.
You know, human nature is vain and competitive. Who can accept that the people around them are better than themselves?
The fourth category: People who always feel that others owe them something.
There is a type of people who have a very twisted mentality. They always think that their miserable lives are caused by others, and thus they resent others, hate the world, and feel that the world owes them.
For example, you are all brothers and sisters from the same clan. If you already have a house, a car, and a successful career, but your brothers and sisters have nothing, then your brothers and sisters will blackmail you morally and tell you that "if you have money, you should help your poor relatives."
You don't understand. You have a house and a car, which you have worked hard for. Why do you have the obligation to help your poor relatives?
Why would I be held hostage by them?
This is what Confucius said, "It is not the scarcity of wealth that is worrying, but the inequality of wealth." When everyone is poor together, there will be no complaints or regrets. Now that you are rich and they are still poor, don't they regard you as an enemy?
You don't owe them anything, but they always think that you owe them something because you have money. This is the typical logic of "moral kidnapping".
When getting along with poor relatives, try not to talk about how rich you are, so as to avoid being targeted and causing the two parties to become enemies.