As time goes by, I have a deeper understanding of human nature since I turned 30. I have gradually realized that giving help and advice is not always so direct and simple. Unless others clearly express their desire for advice or are willing to pay for it, I tend to be cautious and avoid offering too much help or advice. There are several profound reasons for this:

First of all, self-protection is a basic need for everyone. Just like experienced veterinarians may also encounter animal attacks, being too proactive in helping others may sometimes cause us to inadvertently get into unnecessary disputes and troubles.

Secondly, we need to respect the self-esteem of others. Sometimes, unsolicited help and advice may make the other person feel that their value is questioned, or even hurt their self-esteem. Everyone has their own pride and self-esteem, and we should learn to take this into consideration when providing help.

Furthermore, everyone has their own growth trajectory and pace. If the other party does not show a willingness to change, then our advice and help may only become a burden on their way forward. What they need may only be our emotional support and encouragement, rather than specific action suggestions.

I am not advocating indifference or alienation, but I hope that we can help others in a more strategic way. I have inadvertently caused trouble to others because of my over-enthusiastic attitude, which made me reflect deeply. I found that most people do not need direct help, but emotional support from us to understand them, accompany them, and empathize with them.

Therefore, let us put aside the obsession of "I must help others" and respect everyone's growth trajectory and choice. Before deciding to lend a helping hand, ask the other party if they need it, rather than unilaterally deciding how to help them. In this way, our help can truly play a role, make the relationship between each other more harmonious, and make our lives better.

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