If you have less money, you need to control your position

I don't understand why I can never buy the right contracts. A month ago, I saved up 5000 yuan over three months, living frugally, and made my first 100 USD from SOL. On December 20th, I directly blew up 800 USD all gone. I added another 200 USD and lost down to 100 USD. A few days ago, I added 250 USD, and today I've lost another 60 USD. Do I really not deserve a comeback?